It’s been challenging the last several months to get out of bed before the sun rises (not to mention the little toddler who frequently crawls into bed and throws a tantrum when she catches me sneaking out). Last night I set the intention to wake up at 5:30 a.m. and mentally prepared myself (and my little bean in case she came looking for me she wouldn’t panic). I knew I needed this—I’ve been feeling out of sorts, hostile, and heavy all around. I was close to breaking.
When the melody of my alarm kicked in, I shot out of bed and focused on how good I was going to feel breathing in the morning air, achieving this goal, and basking in the runner’s high the rest of the day. This should be enough, I told myself. Today it was.
I ran through a foggy drizzle, allowed the soft rain to seep into my skin, and listened to myself breathe. I knocked out three miles and right when I got in, I heard a cheery voice at the top of the steps, “Mommy? I stayed in my bed for 2 hours, and now I’m ready to exercise with you!” I told her how I proud I was of her after she climbed out of bed and rather than stretching with me, she opted to sit on my lap and hang glide on my back. We rolled around and giggled like goofballs.
Everyday I will build my discipline, make being healthy a habit again, and maintain my commitment to training. I’m grateful for the support of my family and friends in this journey and need to remember that including them helps me to succeed.
The weather is slowly getting better in Chicago and soon the sun will be enough of a reminder that rising early to run fills me with an overwhelming high that I just can’t do without. When I run, I feel a light within me even when the sun is hidden behind the clouds or has set for the day, and in those fleeting moments, everything is enough, including me.